Bleh

My Halloween story sucks. I am sad about it. That is all

Long-awaited, most tedious update

I say tedious because I'm having to type with 2 fingers, deleting typos at least once or twice a sentence. My hands have gotten progressively worse since my August flare-up. I got on steroids at the end of September (oral, rather than IV) which actually helped quite a bit on all of my other symptoms (fairly standard Elly-MS-flare-up symptoms). However, my hands are now nearly useless. I drop everything I try to hold including phones, butter and needles. I can't open jars or my medication bottles. I can't put my hair up in an elastic. I can hardly go to the bathroom w/o help.

I'm getting on a new primary medication, b/c a blood test was done and they found that I've built up antibodies against my meds. But there was a paperwork snafu and I'm not getting it as fast as I should be (which was apparently supposed to be 2nd week of Oct).

I've come to realize that I'm a Darwinist, or whatever you call people who believe in survival of the fittest more than anything else. I'm somewhat ashamed to admit that I don't really believe in social programs that care for people who can't care for themselves. So, my moral beliefs are actually conflicting with my existence ATM.

It's just an uncomfortable place to be, morally, emotionally, physically. I don't know what I'm going to do if it doesn't pass. Aside from basic functionality, everything that I do that I love, arts & crafts & etc, require hands. :-&

So yeah, I'm in a little bit of a dark place right now. I made Branden and Carlie some kick-ass Halloween costumes, and consequently, didn't finish my own. My house is so messy I can't stand it. I haven't had time to eat "real" food since October started. All of a sudden, I can understand why 15% of all deaths in MS patients is suicide.

I can only hope that the party tonight makes up for all of it, and afterwards the stress level declines and I get my new medication and my hands magically get better. >_< Cross your fingers for me.

Bzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz...

That sound? The Bzzzzzzzzz? that's the drone of my life. I'm updating because Hanna told me to. Truly, I have very little to say.

But, I guess I'll do a short update on what I do have to say. First off, bikes.

My first experience with our new bikes was... and adventure. I had ridden my bike around the block a few times to make sure it worked, then Branden rode it from our house to a bus stop, then from the bus stop to my work, all without incident. However, when I got off work and went to ride it back to the bus stop, the rear tire was flat. This was immediately after I got the bike back from the shop for a full tune-up and etc. Turns out, they didn't replace the tubes. Remember, my bike is ancient--that tube could be 12 years old. I have no idea. Anyway, I took it back to the shop and they generously didn't charge me for labor, though I did have to buy the new tube. >_< Now, when I spin my pedals backwards, at all, the chain does one of two things: if it's on the big gear, it hops off the gear an loops around my pedal. If it's on one of the other two gears, the top strand of chain goes slack and gets stuck between the frame and the rear tire. Branden was looking at it and our theories converge: we think that one of two things is the problem. Either my wheel's not on my bike properly, or the gears are attached to my rear wheel wrong, so that the gears can't spin backwards (or even stay still when I'm walking my bike, or just coasting without pedaling, for example). I'm starting to get really frustrated. But I guess the good news is that the bike still works, even if it's got these chain quirks.

Second, everyone moving in. The third new arrival in our apartment complex is moving in this Saturday. Having the first two around these last couple of weeks has been really awesome, and unless there's yicky drama, I anticipate a year of social whoo-hoo. Unfortunately, the possibility for drama will spike considerably for the next two weeks or so, as our third arrival attempts to get one of the first arrivals into bed and fails...

Hopefully, that won't happen. Can't promise anything though.

So, we (Branden, Sarah, Joe, Steph, Ian, Dan, and I) went camping over the 4th of July. We went up to Wyoming to shoot off fireworks. I'm not going to go through it every moment by miserable moment, but I'll list the highlights:

1. Sarah got allergies as bad or worse than Branden's, but usually doesn't have any allergies at all, so didn't know how to handle them. She was miserable all weekend.
   
2. We had an ideal spot to shoot off fireworks: A huge flat rock. However, when we tried to shoot them off on Friday night, some jackass started yelling at us to "take our fireworks home." OMFG, it was the 4th of July for pete's sake. But, we quit so that we wouldn't have the forest service called on us, since we were camping in a national forest.
   
3. After our failed fireworks attempt, most people went to bed, and Joe and Dan stayed up drinking until 6 am. They drank ALL the liquor that was supposed to last 2 nights for 7 people. >_< Then, they started dragging burning sticks around, trying to fight Branden, and grabbing the saw and shouting that they should go saw more firewood, etc stupid crap.
   
4. So, on Saturday, Sarah, Joe, Branden, and Ian took a field trip to Laramie to get more liquor and other things. The field trip that was supposed to last 1 hour actually lasted 3, and left me and Steph completely alone and bored. (Dan slept most of the day.) Though, I did end up talking to Steph about stuff, which was nice. Nonetheless, it was a long, dry 3 hours since all we had to drink was soda, it was 90 degrees out, and we also had no food. Argh.
   
5. So, they returned with some more liquor (but no water >_<!!!!!!) and we had sandwiches. Then everyone but Sarah and Joe went into the tent and took a nap. Sarah and Joe went for a drive. The rest of us decided that we'd vote to go home when they got back, since it had turned out to be a pretty boring trip so far.
   
6. However, when they finally returned, they had a camp table and a few other things that made it seem stupidly selfish to go home after they spent the money, especially since all 7 of us are in dire straights for funds right now and we knew it was an effort to revitalize the trip.
   
7. So, we stayed. Sarah was in a terrible mood and basically refused to have any fun. We went up and shot off the fireworks that were small and didn't make noise, saving the noisemakers for last. However, when we did get to those, the same jerk-off started yelling at us, so we stopped again.
   
8. So, we went into the tent and set up the table to play some card games. It was, as you might imagine, quite crowded, with Sarah asleep on one side and B & my air mattress tipped up on the other. But, grudgingly, I have to say that the game was fun anyway.
   
9. Then we all went to sleep. We woke up the next day, broke camp, and went home (the process of breaking camp took 2 hours, driving 3). Sarah was again in a terrible mood.
   
10. Overall, I'd rather be playing video games.

Other than that, I've gotten back into art in a big way. My biggest problem has always been taking my sketches and making them "finished works," and this is no exception, but I've definitely been working hard. It's been great.

And work's just... work. It's fine, nothing to report.

We're planning an epic Halloween party. I'm not gonna say more than that for the moment, but... it's epic. People should come.

Ok, bye now!